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Funny wedding readings
A well-placed laugh does something no other kind of reading can — it drops the room's shoulders, breaks the church-hush, and reminds everyone that this couple is real. The trick is warmth: funny with love, not funny at anyone's expense.
These are the readings we recommend when a couple asks for something "a bit lighter". They earn a laugh, then hand the room back gently.
Funny readings that actually land
- 01
Learned in Kindergarten
by Robert Fulghum, b. 1937Remember the little seed in the plastic cup? The roots go down and the plant goes up
Read the full poem → - 02
Love is like owning a dog
by Taylor Mali, b. 1965Love makes you meet people wherever you go
Read the full poem → - 03
Love me
by Bee Rawlinson, contemporaryYou in shorts and socks and sandals; Me with warts and huge love-handles
Read the full poem → - 04
Oh, the places you will go!
by Dr. Seuss, 1904 ~ 1991Things can happen and frequently do, to people as brainy and footsy as you
Read the full poem → - 05
Scientific Romance
by Tim Pratt, b. 1976I’d still spend at least 10^21 processing cycles a month just sitting on a virtual couch with you, watching virtual TV, eating virtual fajitas
Read the full poem → - 06
Zuccini Shofar
by Sarah Lindsay, b. 1958Let living room pianos invite unwashed hands
Read the full poem →
Choosing your reading
Will a funny reading undercut the ceremony?
Not if it's placed well. A lighter reading works best in the middle — after the couple has entered and before the vows. Bookend it with something more tender and the arc of the ceremony holds.
How many readings should we have?
One or two is typical for a shorter ceremony; three works well if you'd like to give more guests a role. Vary the tone so the ceremony doesn't sit on one note.
Who should read?
Choose people whose voices you love hearing — siblings, close friends, a parent, a chosen family member. Send the reading in advance so they can practise.